Dad for Beginners

Amateurism at its best

June 28, 2013
by Creed
2 Comments

Whale Watching v. Womb Watching

Watching an unborn fetus move and observing it through the pregnant woman’s stomach is a mystical experience. It makes the baby real. Of course, we as men already know that it is real from the doctor appointments we’ve attended, massages … Continue reading

June 24, 2013
by Creed
1 Comment

Perineal Massage: How to Finger Your Wife With a Purpose

A good old fashioned fingerbang is often one of the first sexual experiences for a young man. Although a minor accomplishment when compared to the sexual spectrum of adult life, it is monumental in adolescence. It is a milestone. It … Continue reading

Vikings

June 18, 2013
by Creed
2 Comments

How to Help Your Wife Maintain her Dignity During Childbirth

Let’s be honest, from a purely mechanical perspective, birthing a baby does not uphold a high level of decorum. She will be groaning, grunting and sweating like a tug boat captain off the coast of New Jersey in high summer, … Continue reading

June 15, 2013
by Creed
3 Comments

How to be an Emotional Father

The emotional attachment of being a father sometimes scares me. I’m willing to admit that I’m pretty unavailable when it comes to extroverted emotion. I don’t like it. I don’t like when other people get emotional around me. I don’t … Continue reading

June 13, 2013
by Creed
0 comments

Paternity Leave in a Broken System

The pitfalls of maternity leave in America have been endlessly chronicled. It is no secret that much like our political system, medical system, and retirement system, our system for parental benefits is laughable. If maternity leave is laughable, paternity leave … Continue reading

June 10, 2013
by Creed
1 Comment

How to Save Money During Pregnancy, pt. 1

The Human Pregnancy Pillow There is a lot of money spent on marketing campaigns designed to convince pregnant women they need items that they do not. One glaring example of this is the pregnancy pillow. Essentially, it is a giant … Continue reading

June 2, 2013
by Creed
0 comments

What They Never Told You About Fatherhood

What they never told you about fatherhood, is that it begins the moment that positive test comes back. From that moment, your life as an independent, childless alpha male is laid to rest and you become a submissive lapdog responsible … Continue reading

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