There is a lot of money spent on marketing campaigns designed to convince pregnant women they need items that they do not. One glaring example of this is the pregnancy pillow. Essentially, it is a giant molar-shaped futon mattress with a slit that a pregnant woman uses to support her warped pregnant body. There is all kinds of marketing that will tout the comfort and physical benefits this incomplete futon mattress provides. The truth is, a pregnancy pillow can be easily mimicked with two regular pillows and a moderately sized partner, sans the $80 expense.
I am…The Human Pregnancy Pillow! Sent to rescue pregnant women’s resting spinal columns and protruding stomachs from the ails of a poorly supportive mattress. I do not seek recognition. I am genuinely altruistic.
Look at that beautiful fishhook s-curve, the thick center, and the signature leg rest. The human version of this pillow, rarely seen in its natural habitat, possesses all the assets of artificial pregnancy pillows and comes at a fraction of the price. Pregnant women the world over can rejoice. Salvation has arrived!