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Dad for Beginners

Amateurism at its best

January 12, 2015
by Creed
0 comments

Reconciling Dystopia

Becoming a new parent is overwhelming. So overwhelming, in fact, that new parents may feel a bit bipolar at times. Occasionally, sordid and evil thoughts permeate your brain. Harming your child is not a realistic option, although at times it … Continue reading

May 16, 2014
by Creed
1 Comment

I Hope You Have a Child Just Like You

Parents use this expression. It is one of the many colloquialisms of parenthood. I think we all heard it at some point in our childhoods. “One day I hope you have a child just like you.” But what is that? … Continue reading

February 25, 2014
by Creed
1 Comment

No Crying in the Breast Milk

Having a bad attitude is sometimes enough to ruin your day. Sometimes, if your attitude is bad enough, it can ruin the day of those around you as well. Personalities are infectious, just like yawns. A bad attitude can ruin … Continue reading

January 31, 2014
by Creed
0 comments

Parenting is Rewarding

Parenting is rewarding, so goes the expression anyway. The phrase “parenting is rewarding” is peppered throughout conversations between parents and non-parents. Locating the rewarding part of parenting, however, is more elusive than the cliché makes it sound. In fact, unbeknownst … Continue reading

unconditional love

October 1, 2013
by Creed
0 comments

Forced Maturity Through Fatherhood

With all my might, I fought it. I resisted with the strength of one medium sized man. I searched endlessly for a way to remain as I was. But with fatherhood, it was not to be. This is how my newborn … Continue reading

parental bipolarism

September 6, 2013
by Creed
4 Comments

Parental Pseudo-Bipolarism

 “Oh my god! Two options are running through my head right now. 1. To jump out the window of a 20-story building or 2. To fucking put him in the crib and run and run and run the fuck away.” … Continue reading

helplessness of babies

August 28, 2013
by Creed
3 Comments

The Remarkable Helplessness of Babies

As any new parent will surely attest, babies are remarkably helpless. It is frustrating. So frustrating, in fact, that online forums of emotional solace exist merely so new parents can vent their frustrations and confirm that they are, indeed, not … Continue reading

baby clothes

August 8, 2013
by Creed
3 Comments

Baby Clothes: A Tale of Parental Vanity & Bodily Functions

Sometimes it amazes me how many clothes my infant son has. Our home, once pristine, is overrun with baby clothes. He’s monopolized a decent portion of our closet and doesn’t seem to be relinquishing it anytime soon. I tolerate it … Continue reading

raising kids

August 5, 2013
by Creed
3 Comments

Raising Kids: Children Might Be Parasites

Raising kids is difficult, especially when children and babies don’t always seem all that different from parasites. They attach themselves to a host. They consume. They contribute nothing. In fact, one could argue that raising kids from fetal to age … Continue reading

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